After we pulled off the bank heist, things got a little messy when we dropped the bags. My partner said it was because we weren't organized enough. I thought it was because we mistakenly robbed a sperm bank and not a money bank. I think we're both right.

Here's a thought: Maybe God is a scientist and everybody's right.

If I were head of an organization that investigated stuff, my first case would be finding out what happened to the black people who lived in Bedrock between the "Flintstone Kids" and "The Fintstone" eras.

I have a million dollar idea that I'm willing to sell for $50,000. Contact me if you're intrested. No police or lawyers, please.

Interesting fact: 100% of crimes committed are committed by criminals.

The grass is not always greener on the other side, unless you're a potato.